I was invited to take part in a co-mentoring programme for Black Cultural Educators by Black Artists on the Move, partnered with Black American Female Educator Joy Jones which formed four Skype conversations over a four month period. I kept a Journal on my lived experience for two weeks of this period. Here it is:
HONESTLY I FEEL.
Day 1: TINGLY
Day 2: Like a warm mush in a continual orgasm
Day 3: In a Bermuda triangle- ‘Outside of Myself’
Day4: Continually Jilted, Tilted on the verge of stalling off my Atlas
Day 5:Like a Flesh wound of new skin that I’m trying to keep clean
Day 6: I can’t’ stand the Smell of
“Vodka soaked Bollox”
Day 7: That I continually clean up others shite from a leaving party I wasn’t invited to before I can conceive of ‘HOME’, move in, find safety or security, or lay foundations.
Day 8: Ahhh…A long sign turn to the right hand,
Head tilts back,
And mouth and Left side.
SLASH! Water on legs
ABC ABC ABC ABY ABS ABX
Day 9: Life’s uncertainty playing out like a healing crisis,
Like a societal rash, I break out – THERE’S A CULUTRAL SHIFT
Day 10: Tingle NRUT
Day 11: Rash- Back!!!StomachAche!!!FLASH.
Day 12: Pick up, put down, repeat this Action for 2-12 hours a day continuously in a figure of 8.
Day 13: Uncluttering, Cleaning dry treading the fine line Opening the possibility for more. Sensitive, Creative, Moving, Emotion, Overfull, Overfill.
Day 14: That Prickly Feeling
Of being Watched from Afar
By Someone Important
Day 15: Relaxed.
Day 16: A Tired, excited, bubbling pressure on my face.
Day 17: ‘Wishing From The Top’.
San-Ko-Fi, is saying taken from the A’Kan people, native to Ghana, which translates as: ‘To return, and Fetch, Your Seat’ .